And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
