how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
