He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
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