Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
