2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
