Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize