it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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