I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
