so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
