Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize