Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
