Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
