oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize