Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
