DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
I skipped work to stalk him.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Less talking, more tequila
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
