ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
