Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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