he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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