I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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