U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
