I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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