i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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