I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
PANTIES FOUND
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