Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Randomize
