GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
