It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize