This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
