the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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