The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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