I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
