Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
farters have to be the big spoon...
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Can I color on your dick again?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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