me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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