Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Please don't give away my fajitas
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
