it's too hot outside to masturbate.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
