Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
