Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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