You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize