hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
