We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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