If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
