I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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