Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Randomize