this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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