Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
