Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
