found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize