no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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