yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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