She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
