I'm drive I can fine osifer
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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