My first STD was from a foam party
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Randomize